Buyer wants a refund 5 weeks after sale saying good faulty

No, that's not fair. The time to question the seller as to why there are holes in the garment is when they unpack it. You have no idea what has happened to it since the buyer received it, unless they have given you further information or sent you photos that show the condition as being different than the photos in the auction.

14th Nov 2022 I brought and paid for promptly a watched described as been old Vintage and  old. 14 December last week,  despite giving the seller another 48 hrs to sort, and if did not hear back promptly just after that time, under trde mes  7  to 10 rule for posting,  I had to ask for a refund. Person never got back untiI called them.... they are refusing to pay back $89.33.  Then citing the packaged went all the  sth island and I am north island, and yes  they had my correct address. Is that fair for them to refuse to refund my money, as I told them  as long as I had given correct address, it was the "unreasonable time" nearly 30 days, still no watch,. It should not be the customer issue about the lack of Commnications, after the seller promised to stay in touch, they never did, until I did thought heck nearly 1mth where is it.... still not arrived, but as seller new by last week I asked for my money back and have done so many times now, they refuse, citing it is a courier fault, but I no longer care, no parcel still, money back  as feel should not be a issue to do so. Is it fair and r4easonable? even if customer has no product. they brought.

I am very tried, meant last week gave them 48 hrs to sort, and at lest stay in contact else to give money back. Now its 14th December and they have sent me emails saying whats wrong  with me?  Past 7 or 1o days, like nearly   30 days and no package in sight.

Yes, you should either get what you bought or a refund if you don't receive it.

Have you been given a tracking number? If so, what does the tracking say? If not, ask the seller for it now.

Immediately, as you only have 30 days since purchase, Click the Dispute Resolution button in the auction to let Trademe know. Depending how you paid, there will be instructions on that page as to what to do and how you can be refunded via Trademe's buyer protection if you paid via Trademe's payment systems like Ping or Afterpay. See this help page.

Buyer Protection – Help - Trade Me

Place feedback now, as you only have 45 days since purchase to place it. You can edit later if required.

For the future: Don't wait so long. If you haven't received the goods within 5 days of buying and have not received a tracking number, check your items I won page to see if there is a courier tracking there in case the seller has entered it there for you but forgotten to let you know by email. If you have a tracking number, check it to see what the courier website says. If you haven't been sent a tracking number, ask the seller for it. If you don't hear back, after 7 days total since purchase, check the seller's feedback page, contact Trademe via the Dispute resolution system, no matter how you paid.

Good luck.